Now that I’ve got your attention with the word “boobs” in the title, I do have a serious question to ask. At some point last year, I hit the age where I look at women’s ring fingers when I speak to them. NOT because I perceive every female as a “target”, but it’s more of a curiosity/habit thing now. I guess I became more sensitive to this as several of my friends were getting engaged and/or married. Today, I met some women and found myself looking down at their ring fingers. I know women check men’s ring fingers as well, but I immediately wondered: Should you be subtle when looking at ring fingers?
I know some of you must be upset by this point wondering: “What does this have to do with boobs!?” Let me explain: Everyone knows that both men and women notice boobs. However, because it’s rude, people try to be subtle about looking. Does the same apply for ring fingers? Obviously I know there’s a big difference because: “Hey, that’s a nice ring!” is probably OK, whereas “Hey, that’s a nice rack!” definitely isn’t.
I’m just afraid that if someone notices you “checking out” their ring finger, they might get the wrong idea. Are you observant enough to notice when someone looks at your ring finger? I’m not. Do you care? Thoughts?
I’m blissfully oblivious to it unless the ring happens to be massive and he/she waves it around like a spastic monkey.
I’d probably be rather subtle if I were checking out someone’s ring. Not as subtle as I would be if I was checking out the boobs, but still a bit subtle nevertheless.
Darwin – “…waving it around like a spastic monkey.” LOL!
OK, so since you recommend being subtle does that mean you think someone could get the wrong idea?
Darwin – You check out boobs?
ok…
I probably wouldnt notice. But I have neither rings nor boobs so I cant say for sure.
I guess some people are just uncomfortable when they’re judged on external qualities.
Dili – Lately, most of the boob comments I’ve heard have come from women (not men)!
It’s not so much judging someone based on an external trait; I was more concerned with the perception of checking out someone’s ring finger…
I don’t check for rings.. but I think if I did, one must be subtle, no reason to get your intentions misread (i.e jealous girlfriend who is staring at chick that just met her man and scoped his ring finger..)
BM – Yup, so just as I figured, it’s probably wise to be subtle about it. Unless, of course, the ring is huge and you’re about to make a comment!
Yeah I think everyone should be subtle when it comes to CHECKING out. May it ring, boobs, ass, etc….
However, concerning the ring or rather the absence of ring, it is not a 100% sign of being single nowadays as more and more people live together without even considering getting married.
In the summer, 2 years ago I was having a chat with a man and I found he didn’t have a ring but he had a white mark where the ring was supposed to be (suntan). 2 options: either he was recently getting a divorce or he was just lying-cheating-son-of-a-bitch! Any other suggestion?
That was just a rather unrelated (but not totally) story…
Bisous
Vanessa
lol Hilarious but true! I totally catch guys checking out my ring finger. I even notice them TRYING to be subtle! All this cracks me up inside…What’s funny is that even when I’m pushing my baby in her stroller, I still notice guys checking my left hand out…even though I’m not waving it around like a “spastic monkey” lol..I guess they’re wondering if I’m the aunt or baby sitter, or perhaps just admiring the ring. lol It doesn’t bother me! It’s all good…
Vanessa – I didn’t think checking ring fingers was a big deal, but based on all the comments, I’ve learned that I need to be subtle about looking now!
“…or he was just lying-cheating-son-of-a-bitch!”
HA HA HA HA HA This was the funniest thing I read all day!!! Thanks for that!
Queenie – That’s what I’m saying, aunt, baby-sitter, pushing a baby carriage or not, it’s just a question of curiosity!
It’s nice that it doesn’t bother you, but you do notice people looking, so it’s safe to assume the other women notice too!
I think that it’s fine to blatantly check out the ring finger – as long as this prompts you to some degree of respect! My husband now claims to be hit on more and more at the office since he got married, it’s like he’s been test driven and got a good consumer report and now they want him! Respect the rings!!!
Boobs – if you got em, then you just get used to people looking at them! As rude as that can be…
Amanda – LOL @ “Respect the rings!!!”
Unfortunately, it’s my understanding that people who are engaged/married come across as a bigger challenge, so they tend to be hit on more.
No worries, I respect the rings… although I’ve been in a couple of situations where the person wearing the ring didn’t seem to respect it!!
I wouldn’t think it’s rude if someone openly checked out my ring finger. It’s better than hitting on me, totally oblivious to the sparkly bands on my finger. I actually had a friend of a friend hit on me at a baseball game *with my husband sitting right next to me.* It wasn’t until our mutual friend said something casually about our wedding that the guy finaly realized he was barking up the wrong tree.
Hey Ian! I saw a post on fb that led me to your blog.
Since I have been moving around a lot, when I meet people its usually people I don’t know, and I tend to feel tense when talking to a guy until the subject of whether I’m attached comes up. Noticing that someone checked out my ring finger and somehow acknowledged that there is a ring there (usually via some kind of unconscious body language) puts me much more at ease. I just wanna be friends, ya know?
But how does one get across that message in a first meeting without the guy feeling a little shot down…and I think the answer is checking for a ring. So, do it, do it, do it! I dont think its rude, and can actually be a relief…everyone knows where they stand.